Stuck with what to get your maternal parent for the upcoming Mother's Day celebration? Keep in mind, your moms loves three things:
2. Anything you make yourself, no matter the age you make it at
Why not combine the three in a handmade gift that's sure to bring a smile to her hugely underappreciated face? The love, effort, and bacon that goes into this gift will nearly make up for all the dumb kid stuff you put her through, especially those teenage years (trust me--you were an asshole). Another benefit: The price off all the stuff--bacon, chocolate, and mold--will only total ten bucks or so (nice if you're underemployed).
One note: While candy may be dandy, I highly recommend you get her another gift to go with the hearts. Possibly diamonds set in platinum.
Chocolate Bacon Hearts
* 1 lb. bacon, crisp cooked and crumbled into itty bits
* 14 oz bag Candy Melts in any flavor (available at your local crafts store)
* Candy mold (also at your friendly neighborhood crafts store)
What to do:
Melt the chocolate according to the package directions. Not the whole bag--maybe a half cup o' chips at a time. Stir in a few tablespoons of bacon bits into the melted chocolate, then carefully spoon the mixture into the mold. Fill each level and even (if you overfill, level off with a knife). Gently tap the mold on the counter a few times to kill any air bubbles. Pop the mold into the freezer for 5 to 10 minutes--just long enough for the candy to set--then invert the mold onto a flat, clean surface. Store the finished candy in a cool, dry place while you make the remaining candies. Put the completed batch in a nice bag, box, or other container so it looks all pretty.
By the way, you don't have to make hearts--the candy aisle contains tons of options, from lollipops shaped like roses, to bonbons that look like hot dogs. If you search "candy molds" online, the possibilities are even broader. No matter the shape, Mom'll love her gift, because it came from her bacon-loving kid.