Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Test #131: Bacon and JELLY BEANS

The subject
Jelly beans have their origin in centuries-old Turkish Delight, the jelly-like candy that the White Witch entices Edmund with in The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe. While we find the "Delight" part of that name to be a total misnomer, we find jelly beans very delightful. I mean, they're sugar-coated sugar--how could you not love that? The little morsels have had tons of fans over the years, from Union soldiers in the Civil War, to President Ronald Reagan, to the kids at Hogwarts. The fine people at Jelly Belly actually make a Muggletized version of Bertie Botts' Every Flavor Beans--just watch out for the Vomit and Rotten Egg beans.

Jelly beans are one of the most Easter of candies, sure to be in your Easter basket this coming Sunday. We opened a bag a few days early to put our favorite colors to the bacon test (side note: we were totally freaked out when we opened the bag of Brach's beans and saw not a single yellow bean). Here we go...

The result
Much like yesterday's Peepxperiment, much of the test subject squeezed out the ends and got all black and icky. However, while the Peep residue served to candy the bacon left behind, the sweetness and the flavor of the jelly beans completely vacated the premises, leaving behind three tasteless lumps of transluscent gelatin from the jelly-bean centers. The taste wasn't horrible, but the consistency was just plain weird...snotlike, in fact. The result might go over well with nosepicking gradeschoolers, but not with the BDJ Labs staffers--our booger-snackin' days are far behind us.

The conclusion: Bacon + jelly beans = boogeriffic

Wednesday: Bacon + Cadbury Creme Egg
Thursday: Bacon + matzoh

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